The following is a thing I wrote as part of a new series of reflections called: On Physical Mastery. (Oh, and I don’t mean “conditioning” as in energy systems, In case anyone’s mind went there. Pun sort of intended…)
I’d like to share my humble thoughts on having physical and fitness goals in this time of pandemic (although I was thinking these things pre-COVID, they seem especially relevant now).
Have you noticed? The government is telling us what our fitness goals should be, and how we should achieve them.
This isn’t really anything new. From the food pyramid, to Body Break (with Hal Johnson and Joanne Mcleod!), society has been telling us what we are supposed to do with our bodies. What appropriate goals should be.
If you’ve read anything in the news lately, the latest “should” is that, despite the call the stay at home, we must keep exercising for our health right now.
And I don’t disagree.
I am happy that in this global health crisis, our collective, primary reason to exercise has deepened. I can see a shift from shallowly chasing a “fit body”, aesthetics-based, physical norm, to authorities encouraging us to “move because your health depends on it”. It is even being acknowledged that movement and exercise are necessary for our mental health. This is amazing.
But there’s still something insidious to be aware of… We’re still being told why we should exercise, and we’re not questioning it.
Society, the government, is still exercising influence over our beliefs about what we do with our bodies. Just that the form in which it is doing so has changed. However, whenever there is an outside source guiding what we should do with our bodies, when we’re not aware that our decisions are not our own, no matter how benign or in our interest it may seem, we cannot truly, honestly be in touch with who we really are.
I hate to break it to you, but your- all of our- physical goals have been hijacked. It just seems a little less in our face right now because it feels like the suggestion is coming from a caring place. Maybe the government does care. True or hidden motives aside, that’s missing the point.
The point isn’t whether or not the recommendation is useful, it is whether or not it bubbled up from a well-spring of truth from deep inside you, or it was dumped on your head from a 3rd floor window.
You see, I struggle with this. My conditioning for a long time has been to believe that exercise is important because one should not get fat. Exercise builds discipline and character (more like stubbornness and rigidity…). Healthy, beautiful people exercise regularly, intensely, and often. Exercise is a moral decision- it simply makes you a better person. This is what I was taught in my family of origin.
I reckon with this conditioning everyday. It rules more than just the physical area of my life. If I’m paying attention, it permeates every decision I make.
Yet I know a deeper truth. If I look at what it means to rise above the “shoulds” I learned, its almost as if I don’t know what to do with my body. Up until recently, I’d never examined if my goals and intentions for exercise were mine- something working through me- or if they’ve been hijacked by someone else- something I was working through.
If you look you will see how many of your physical goals can be traced back to another person or an institution, who taught you “this is what exercise is for”. And they may have had incentive for you to believe in them that were not in your best interest (if best interest means your well-being, freedom, and vitality).
I’m not saying that we should rebel against the government’s suggestions and not exercise daily. I wholeheartedly think we should!
And i’m not rebelling against my parents’ beliefs that staying lean and building discipline are good reasons to exercise, because leanness and discipline are components of health and vitality.
My point is simply that these beliefs need to be investigated. Are they true for me? And is the way I’m acting them out truly serving me?
And I think at the core of it, when I strip away everything I’ve ever been taught about exercise, and tune in to what is important for me, the role for movement in my life is more than health and fitness. More than strength and looks. It’s to keep me grounded. To keep me balanced. To keep me present in my physical home. Its to keep my brain healthy as much as my body. Anything else, any other result I attain, is a byproduct.
If you feel aimless without a clearly defined goal, you might scroll through Instagram to find one, but you’ll only find yourself hijacked.
Is being present with your body enough? Or does exercise need to be a means to an end? Ask yourself, to whom does that end serve? Is it you? Or is it someone else you’re aiming to please?
So yes, do exercise for your health. But do it for you because you care about you.
And yes, exercise because it keeps you lean and strong, but don’t do it mindlessly like a hamster on a wheel. Can you find a way to engage with exercise such that the physical result you achieve is simply the byproduct of cultivating a state of mind in which presence, celebration, and kindness to your body are the goal itself?
Don’t just chase a result because that’s what everyone else is doing. Engage with your body with reverence for its brilliance, and you will be amazed at the result- the inner vitality- that naturally unfolds.
But how do you know if your goal is your own, or you’ve been hikacked? Its not always easy to tell… It takes a desire to see reality as it is.
But you can start like this:
Before each time you step out for a walk, or lie on your yoga mat, or strap on your jogging shoes, or lift those heavy ass weights, ask yourself:
What is the source of the goals you have for your body? Are they your own? Or are they hand-me-downs from your family? Your friend? Our society’s standards for health, beauty, and fitness?
Ask: Is your routine an act of reverence for your body? Or are you chasing a result that you were taught somewhere was the “ideal”, but which could be keeping you stuck in a repetitive pattern. Rigid in your thinking as much as your body’s potential for movement.
And then simply try out how it might feel to have no goal other than to celebrate being in your body. Just see what comes up, spontaneously, from the intent for complete presence. No ulterior motive. No agenda. Nothing to gain, and nothing to lose.
Just a humble reflection from the mind of a human who struggles everyday to understand, “what is reality?”.
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